It is nearly one month since the last post....last year! I never did get around to blogging about christmas. i've just been too busy i guess. there have been a lot of changes in my life and unexpected trials and tribulations also.
my new year began as a very busy one and each week has had a tie to the wedding. the first weekend....danny and i had to attend a seminar on nfp. what is nfp, you ask. It is natural family planning. Its birth control for the hard core catholics out there. unfortunately, i am not a hard core catholic, and i simply rely on the method of birth control pills. But you see, i have never had the notion of being a hard core catholic...even growing up i strayed away from the morals of Catholicism. i know i was definitely going to hell when i lost my virginity back in freshman year of high school. those days seem to almost be a distant past for me now. my niece is a freshman in high school right now...playing basketball as i once did. she's following my footsteps in academics and sports...i just hope she doesnt go off fucking the whole student body by her senior year. i know she has morals...better ones than i had when i was that young.
back to the wedding stuff...so every monday at 7pm since january 7 and up to february 11 - dan and i have been attending evenings for the engaged. these evenings have typically lasted up to 2 hours...in that 2 hours we talk about all kinds of stuff. these evenings for the engaged are supposed to help us self reflect and apply it to our future. in a sense, its supposed to get us ready for the future. i must tell you, the topics are pretty ridiculous. I mean, if you havent talked about some of these topics they bring up then i think you dont have any business getting married to begin with. Thus far, we have talked about characteristics we both like in each other and about each other; characteristics of our family - from how they handled differences to how they handle each other; we've done an exercise on listening and telling; to telling the whole group how we met and why we decided to move in with each other. a lot of the questions are actually quite personal to a degree...its definitely not something i would bring up to a stranger to strike a conversation out of boredom. but whatever, the pope is making us go through this 6 nights of weirdness to just get married in the church. i think danny is dealing with it a lot better than i am. i guess, in all reality, i hate doing things that i am told to do. big reason why i never went into the military. so once these 6 weeks are over, we get a little certificate saying that we're compatible and have talked about just everything that may break us a part. but its fair to say that its a learning experience and i'm really not all that opposed to it. i just think its whack that it is mandatory to attend to get married in a church....well st john of the cross to be exact. after we complete this, we have to talk to a priest about differences we managed to score on a questionnaire they made us take. that'll be interesting.
every tuesday night dan has a basketball game. him and the rest of eazy livin get together and try to kick some young'n ass. its kinda funny sometimes. i guess its fair to say that ya'll aint got nothing on white old people! they do pretty good...for being over 30 and peaking to 40.
work...oh my...where do i ever begin about that place. Lets just say i'm fighting to make my place in that world. i just need to stick to my guns and work with my nose to the grinder. being a newbee sucks. i just need to stay positive. gotta stay positive.
the wedding is definitely closing in...and fast. i seem like i have so much to do with no time to do it or help for that matter. this wedding has definitely stressed me out to my max lately and i know its only going to get worse. i've even gotten to the point where i cant sleep at night cause i've got all kinds of things associated with the wedding running through my mind. its horrible. i know it shouldnt be like this. my right hand lady...lives in michigan and cant do shit from where she is at. my mom is A LOT of talk and no action. my bridesmaids are there but not there. i just dont have anyone i feel i can turn to and trust to take care of any of this stuff. janice is the only one who has stepped to the plate and taken charge of something and greatly appreciate it. my other girls are lost in the sauce of the corporate world and are consumed by things that are far more important than my wedding. ha what a joke, huh! i just cant wait till this fiasco is over. i really cant wait...i cant wait for the morning where i can wake up and not have to stress about this wedding. i really cant wait. the wedding itself...doesnt seem exciting to me anymore...its the morning after the wedding where i can finally breathe and be free excites me more. how pathetic is that?
can you believe there are so many little girls in the world that look forward to their wedding day? millions...and they have no idea what it entails....unless you can afford a wedding planner and can sit back and let them do all the bitch work for you....then that would be great. but for the working class like me....those things just arent worth it for the money. how sad is that. my kids are getting married in vegas...i aint going through this shit again.
so there...that's whats happened in the past 30 days....anyone wanna walk in my shoes?
