This week for the kids has been normal. Tyler had state testing so he wasn't too happy about that. He got is very first step reprimand for not asking permission to interview people during class. He also got in trouble at project safe for showing a 4th grader a meme about black people using the N word and laughing about it.
Hannah's week was uneventful. She's gearing up this week for state testing and teacher appreciation week.
It's been a hard week with mom. We had her backup caregiver start Thursday. She did so well until breakfast time. Then she just gave up and wouldn't accept the help. Friday wasn't too bad but Saturday and today have been horrible. She's very defiant and won't get out of bed and it sets me into a tirad. She told me today they she'll leave and never come back and I told her to go because I'm tired of taking care of her. I'm seriously tired. My mental health is at all time low. I contemplate suicide often during the day. I'm at a point where I'm at peace with leaving Dan and the kids alone. They've been alone for 4 years now and I know they're strong enough to carry on and I'll be a distant memory of being that mom or that wife that couldn't hang with life. And I'm ok with that.
In other news Jack was commissioned as a 2nd LT in the Army and graduated from the citadel on Friday and Saturday respectively. I'm proud of him and bummed I couldn't be there...thanks to mom and my asshole brother Paul who won't take care of mom for a few days.
