Today is my 6th day of work out of 9. three more damn days to go before i get a measly 2 days off...wooptie fucking doo! work has really been getting the best of me. i go to work in a bad mood, then i come home in a bad mood. what the fuck is that all about. the people i work with are cool...well a select few, the rest of them are all assholes in their own little ways. those are the people i really dont care to work with. it has come to my attention today, that i am under a lot of pressure at work. my 6 month review has passed, but is now only being issued to me soon. 4 months late...shows you how prompt and proficient my work is. i realized today, why there is such a high turnover rate at my work. the reason being is because people are not being appreciated and rewarded. i'm not asking for a monetary raise, though that would be absolutely wonderful, but i'm talking more like...a pat on the back, an acknowledgement that you did something good, an award, or even a pin to place on your apron. we lack that at my work. we lack positive energy. the only positive energy being thrown around are by fellow co-workers, whose opinions, i might add, do not count towards your overall performance when it comes to reviews.
one of my co-workers today, julius, came in to talk to the store manager...ha good luck on that buddy...to see if he can get a raise. this boy has kept his end of the bargain. does what he is asked and then some...and he asked for a raise. the manager simply told him, make a statement as to why you earn a raise, come the next round table meeting, we'll discuss it and make a decision. seriously, hard work on the floor is not enough? meeting sales goals is not enough? damn....what more? i simply do not understand. i think the reason behind the written statement is because the store manager himself does not even know the progress of his own employees...which is sad. you have to make your employees happy or atleast meet in the middle in order to gain some kind of compliance from the. but here at hell depot, that doesnt matter. we're all work-aholics...really we are. when do we ever really get to take a break? when do we ever really get to have a lunch? when? you're always doing something for the company...always. oh, and here's a note...the raise julius will probably get will be somewhere between a penny and fifty cents. rarely do they give out 50 cent raises. only the lucky receive those....or serious ass kissers. which there are many at my work...we all know who you are.
i have really considered quitting my job...only problem, i need to have an income. i have bills to pay for. its not all fun and games anymore. again the job hunting begins all over again. job hunting is always on for me. i just havent really pushed for anything. i'm too tired at times to even look, my time at work is very tiresome. i find myself completely drained...even on my days off. why is that? i think its because i hate my job...i hate where i work. i hate the hours i work, the inconsistency, the lame ass excuses, the fucked up management, the audits, the lecturing, the yelling from customers and management, its just really all not worth it, and yet i still wake every morning and manage to head on over to work, just to bare it all over again. never ending cycle i guess. maybe manpower has something more to offer, or even trader joes can help me out...hell people have moved on to costco and lowes...why the fuck not? they seem a lot happier.
to top things off, i have the stress of planning a wedding. the endless calls, the endless canvasing, the endless thoughts of how much its gonna cost...all that drains me. almost makes me want to go to vegas. but as i just heard, its too late, we're committed to have a wedding here now. the deposit was made on the reception venue...there's no turning back now. or else we lose $4k...something daniel will not be happy about...or me. it just seems that the planning is getting worse and worse because the expenses keep rising. why does it have to be so expensive? dont answer that...i already know. ah fuck it, 11 months more to go, then it'll all be over....and hopefully life as i knew it will get back on track. hopefully before then i'll have a new job...i think that will relieve a lot of this stress. but who the hell knows nowadays.
anyway, enough bitching...time to figure out whats for dinner...btw buddy...jules stopped in and said whats up...he hasnt seen you in forever...and damnit, pick up your phone or answer back the text messages....get back to us you freak! oh and good job in garden buddy! i appreciate what you do...and i see the hard work you put it. lets find another job!
